I've had every mind to delete this blog because for the life of me, I can't figure out how to work with blogger's new templates and I don't have the time to figure that out, and so my blog has been shit-ass ugly, left with the same template I've been using since secondary school. But I've had this blog since P5 and the sentimental me can't bear to delete this even though I haven't been blogging for the longest time. And tonight is one of those nights where I just need to type everything out - proving that I need this blog to stay with me for life.

So my sister has given birth again, hello to my new baby nephew Caius who was born today, 4 weeks earlier than his due date. Also hello to Stars who are playing in Singapore on the 19th of Feb ahmagaz I am so excited to finally watch them even though I'm not that big a fan of their later 2 albums which they'll probably play more material from at their concert. Also hello to Kings of Convenience again aaaahhhh Erlend Øye my soulmate :-) Who are playing at Laneway next year together with a bunch of other acts I don't really care about. But I've always known that KoC was one band I HAD to watch live again, so sue me if I'm some poser who's only going to Laneway for one act.

Completed my 1st semester at uni, which has been one heck of a semester. So many things to say about school but I'm struggling for the right words to say while being concise. Suffice to say, my anthropology module was hands down the best module ever and my anthro prof was hands down the best prof ever (in terms of personality and quirkiness, though not so much in terms of teaching, because I totally dig anthro people and their indie-ness like how he plays Talking Heads during lectures and wears batik shirts to every lecture and most importantly because he submitted his race as "angmoh" while sending in his vote for Obama to the state of Colorado). French lessons have also been -merveilleuse- because they're really fun and have proven to be my best subject in school so far. My other 3 modules were really really meh, the soci and history exposure modules have proven to be disappointing and I'm not drawn to major in either one of them. What I'm really drawn to major in right now, is SEA but I haven't even taken the expo mod for SEA yet so we'll see how that goes. Not to mention that majoring in SEA totally screws up my exchange in Europe plans but everything in my gut and most importantly, my heart, are all working together to tell me that I need to major in SEA so fingers crossed that this is God's plan for me.

Last week I went for a 4-day CSS retreat where I managed to find peace like I haven't felt in 3 years. Recon was good (I haven't had a recon for 3 years :O), being prayed over by a prayer team was simply amazeballs. They knew the right things to say, the right words to describe my brokenness without me having to tell them anything. Which made me cry while at the same time feeling immense peace and I haven't figured out how that was possible but I guess anything is possible with God. And I've realised that if there's one word to describe my life, it would be peace. It feels like everything in my life is associated with peace even though I'm generally not a peaceful person. Like how my ambition is to be a hippie and bring world peace, like how I was described as a "peaceseeker" during the personality test we had in sec 4, like how of all things I ended up being the facil for group "Peace" during the short time I was a junior cat., like how I always feel peace during spiritual moments (like after recons and after being praying over while other people get slained or burst into Tongues or get visions), like how I generally need peace in my life. I feel like my identity as a person is beginning to take shape, and I'm starting to see who I am. As a whole person, not bits and pieces of what I'm like. If that makes sense.

Anyhoos, I normally do a end-of-the-year post and maybe I'll do one at the end of this year. But this year has been majorly insignificant in the sense that I bummed around for half of the year and didn't do anything. Also this year flew by really quickly and it's all a blur to me so maybe I'd break my tradition of end-of-the-year posts, we'll see. Amazingly, I also don't really have that much of a Christmas wishlist this year. I feel like the older I get, my needs are less materialistic and more idealistic. Like, being able to travel, explore and see the world, and being able to major in anthropology, and attending a university in UK... Okay maybe they're still materialistic because they require tons of money, but tons of money which isn't possible and therefore unachievable "items" for a Christmas wishlist. Maybe the whole point is that I get older, my needs become more expensive and therefore not Christmas wishlist material. Like how I totally need a new ipod or how I still want my expensive Cambridge satchel. And many other things that I myself or no one around me really, are able to afford. Okay I'm rambling goodbye. Merry Christmas, to whoever still reads this space and also HOOOZAH because we've gone past the Mayan apocalypse/doomsday.

Edit: Gossip Girl has actually ended, meaning that 5 years of my teenage life have ended with just that one episode. Damn, I feel really old I can't believe Gossip Girl came out in sec 2 and I've kept up with it every week from sec 2 - uni year 1 ahmagaz. Goodbye GG, I'll miss your music (um hello they totally need more than 1 GG soundtrack), I'll miss Leighton Meester and Chace Crawford (eyecandy) and Dan Humphrey (who turned out to be Gossip Girl major wtf) and Rufus-Lily and pop culture references and Josh Schwartz's amazing work. The day of GG season finale, I also happened to watch the season finale of OC omg, which basically made up my early adolescent years and which I will forever love and miss. Seth Cohen and Summer Roberts I will miss you and I will forever be sad that Adam Brody and Rachel Bilson are no longer together in real life. Also good indie music and pop culture references, both of which own that of Gossip Girl's. Also Sandy-Kirsten and Seth-Summer and can I say Seth Cohen and Summer Roberts again.

11:08 PM;